Lightning Fill In The Blank

Nov 10, 2018
Originally published on November 11, 2018 8:10 am
Copyright 2018 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer - now worth 2 points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Roxanne has 3. Luke and Paula each have 2.

SAGAL: We have flipped a coin, and Paula has elected to go second. That means, Luke, you're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Thursday, Supreme Court Justice blank was hospitalized after breaking her ribs in a fall.

LUKE BURBANK: Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, a judge ordered that Cesar Sayoc be held without bail for allegedly sending blanks to Hillary Clinton, President Obama and CNN.

BURBANK: Pipe bombs.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Calling the election too close to call, Stacey Abrams refused to concede the race for governor of blank.

BURBANK: Georgia.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, Fox News issued a statement saying that it did not condone blank's appearance at a Trump rally in Missouri.

BURBANK: Sean Hannity.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A man of Florida was injured this week after he climbed into a pit of blanks wearing blanks.

BURBANK: Voters wearing a ballot.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: He climbed into a pit of crocs wearing Crocs.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: At an auction held on Thursday, the wheelchair of scientist blank sold for almost $400,000.

BURBANK: Stephen Hawking.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Vince Gilligan and Bryan Cranston both confirmed that a movie based on the hit show blank was in the works.

BURBANK: "Breaking Bad."

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a woman in Salt Lake City who was charged with embezzling from her employer said she only did it so she could pay off blank.

BURBANK: The expensive pair of Crocs her husband had recently lost.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, she says that she embezzled from her employer only so she could pay off the debt she owed from embezzling from another employer.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Back in 2013, Tina Delgado was charged with embezzling over $100,000 from a financial management company and was ordered by the court to pay restitution. She wanted to make things right, so she did what any of us would do. She got a job at a spa and started embezzling money from them to pay the other job back. She's now been charged with stealing another hundred thousand dollars. But she's pretty sure she can set things right if that financial management company will just take her back.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Luke do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Six right, 12 more points - total of 14 to slip into the lead.

SAGAL: That's pretty good there. Paula, you are up next.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Fill in the blank. This week, the president of blank said that the country would ignore new oil sanctions imposed by the U.S.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Iran.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Following Tuesday's election, Ilhan Omar and Rashida Tlaib became the first two blank women elected to serve in Congress.

POUNDSTONE: Muslims.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Despite new tariffs, imports from blank rose by 16 percent this year.

POUNDSTONE: I don't know - maybe China.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, Michigan became the 10th state to legalize blank.

POUNDSTONE: Pot.

SAGAL: Yep.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Recreational pot. This week, a 69-year-old Dutch man asked a judge to legally change his age to 45 on official documents, so he can blank.

POUNDSTONE: Attend preschool.

BURBANK: (Laughter).

SAGAL: No, so he can attract more women on Tinder.

POUNDSTONE: Oh yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Thursday, Elon Musk formally stepped down as the chairman of blank.

POUNDSTONE: Tesla.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, Mary Keitany of Kenya claimed her fourth victory in the blank marathon.

POUNDSTONE: New York.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a woman who found the engagement ring that her boyfriend was planning to propose to her with shared her excitement by tweeting a picture of it with the caption blank.

POUNDSTONE: No way.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No she said, ew.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, jeez.

SAGAL: Not a fan.

AUDIENCE: (Oohing).

SAGAL: I know.

BURBANK: Well, it had his grandma in there.

SAGAL: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: So she tweeted - she found the ring. She's like, oh, my God. He's going to propose to me with this piece of whatever. So she tweeted a picture of it, and she said, not a fan. Can someone tell me how to tactfully say, I won't marry you until you buy something different? After seeing the post, her boyfriend did decide to trade up for a better model and is now happily enjoying life with his new girlfriend.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Paula do on our quiz?

KURTIS: This race is so close. Six right, 12 more points - 14 - they are tied.

POUNDSTONE: Wahoo.

BURBANK: That's an automatic recount...

(LAUGHTER)

BURBANK: ...For the record.

SAGAL: How many, then, Bill, does Roxanne need to win?

KURTIS: Six of them.

SAGAL: Here we go, Roxanne. This is for the game. On Thursday, police identified the gunman who opened fire at a bar in blank.

ROXANNE ROBERTS: In California.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the FCC demanded that telephone companies take action to block blank.

ROBERTS: Spam calls.

SAGAL: Yeah, robocalls.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, the CDC reported that 164 people were made sick by a blank outbreak caused by raw turkey.

ROBERTS: Salmonella.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A juror in the trial of drug kingpin El Chapo was suspected of bias and dismissed after he blanked.

ROBERTS: Is the one that said that - he lied because he didn't want to be on it - that person?

SAGAL: No, this is the guy who asked El Chapo for an autograph.

ROBERTS: Oh, OK.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Prior to the midterm, social media site blank said it had removed 115 accounts over possible election meddling.

ROBERTS: Facebook.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a third man claimed to have sustained serious injuries thanks to an exploding blank.

ROBERTS: An exploding penis enhancer.

(LAUGHTER)

BURBANK: Best-case scenario.

ROBERTS: Was it a beer?

SAGAL: It was, in fact.

KURTIS: Yes.

SAGAL: It was exploding bottle of Corona. Bottles of Corona beer have been exploding around the country. We found now the real threat coming from south of the border.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Two bartenders were injured when a case exploded. And now a California man says he cut his leg when a bottle went off like, quote, "a glass hand grenade." Authorities are urging the public to use caution when handling Corona bottles and reminding you, under no circumstances, should you light your lime wedge on fire before sticking it in there.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Roxanne do well enough to win?

KURTIS: No.

ROBERTS: No.

SAGAL: Oh.

KURTIS: She got 11.

ROBERTS: Yep, it's OK.

KURTIS: But we have two champions.

(APPLAUSE)

BURBANK: Yeah.

SAGAL: Paula and Luke, congratulations. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.